About 4 months ago I was in England, sitting before my laptop, nervously scrolling down The Guardian’s LIVE updates on COVID-19. At that time I was anxiously calculating the possibility of graduating on time, securing a job in London or going back to uni, being able to go home and see my family. I had a pile of deadlines coming up, two part-time jobs, a plane ticket which was later defined as “in the peak of the disease”, a rent, a dissertation — the most important piece of writing for my higher education, and the list went on and on.
Reading the news daily didn’t help. It helped me keep track of what in the name of God was going on and whether I would to be allowed to go home over the Easter holidays. However, health-wise it made things worse because the negativity and the fear certainly outweighed the hopeful headlines.
My life had long been defined by uncertainty. After all, I left my country at the age of 18, on my own, and moved somewhere I had never been before. I thought I knew what uncertainty felt like.
It turned out I didn’t have a good grasp of the concept. I do respect every affected person, and my heart is with anyone who has lost a beloved one because of the virus. Yet, from the perspective of, as they call it, Class of 2020 representative, I tend to say that the pandemic occurred at the worst moment possible.
It affected a very crucial period for me personally: right before my graduation and exactly when I was supposed to plan moving to London or maybe begin a postgraduate course. I believe though that this is painfully relatable to the Class of 2020 around the world.
I suppose I would have said so regardless of when it had happened. If my prom was affected, I would still be unhappy. If my wedding was affected, I would still be upset. In fact, this should have never happened… We have this saying at home that, after all, health is of greatest importance, and everything else comes after.
Everybody was affected “at the worst moment possible” because everyone was looking forward to something. For this reason, I felt a little hopeless at times. Uncertainty quickly went up on my “Worst Feelings Known to People” list. Yet, however I felt never stopped me from looking for a way out. It wasn’t rocket science to figure out that I couldn’t go back to the UK and finish what I had started. The longed for graduation ceremony was also off the table. I had to start from scratch.
After a canceled flight and no response from the airline company, stressful communication with the Bulgarian Ministry of Foreign Affairs, and frantic and pointless search for face masks on the Internet, I finally arrived home. During my 3-week-long self-quarantine I kept on looking for a job knowing that I might be beating my head against the wall.
And then, as unexpected as can be, I found an opportunity. I had a successful interview and I secured a summer internship at the leading telecommunications company in Bulgaria, VIVACOM.
It’s been a week or so since I started as an Intern Specialist at the department of Products and Services for Business Clients. I am currently in training and I am looking forward to learning more and to be in charge of more tasks.
Even though the past few months were a challenging period which often made me question my future, I appear to have come to terms with the concept of uncertainty. Perhaps this is the type of life we will have from now on. Many things and opportunities were taken from me. But that doesn’t mean there won’t be new and better ones.
I have done and I am doing whatever is in my power. And I let myself anticipate the rest with enthusiasm and eagerness.